PISSING OFF UNGODLY WOMEN

Evidently it's my job to comment before I read this Delicious blog on Don Surber's Substack. As a shepherd of the world I am assigned the task of commenting on the world's politics. Hopefully it will go better for me than it did John the Baptist who also had the same responsibility. And like modern politics, one of the most dangerous things a preacher can do is piss off an ungodly woman. Ask the former supporters of Hillary Clinton. Oh wait. You can't ask them. They're dead. I think that's enough for today boys and girls. Keep up the good work and soldier on.

ISRAELI ARABS VERSUS PALESTINIAN ARABS ACCORDING TO GROK

Recently, like just a few minutes ago, I tried asking Google these questions and got a whole bunch of slanted b*******. So I decided to ask Grok and received greater clarity. 

Arab Nations have banded together five times since the formation of Israel. Their intent was to wipe out the Jewish Nation. Between 75% and 90% of those identifying as Palestinians are convinced that peaceful coexistence is not possible with Israel. Arabs who settle in Israel are allowed to apply for Israeli citizenship. Of course, the assumption is they must assume the right of Israel to both exist and defend itself.

MAD DOG RULE NUMBER ONE: NEVER WEAR OUT YOUR WELCOME

In keeping with my tradition of commenting first then reading the always excellent article by Don Surber, I will share with you a forthcoming story that is brewing in my chaotic crock pot brain entitled MAD DOG RULE NUMBER ONE: NEVER WEAR OUT YOUR WELCOME. I will share several stories, all of them spectacular and somewhat unbelievable, yet all of them literally the gospel truth, for I will teach you, boys and girls, through these stories how to become like Solomon. He that wins souls is wise. When God and I are finished with you, you will literally become a tag team with God and you will be UNSTOPPABLE. My first story will involve driving across the tri-state tollway following my imaginary rules called 99 RULES FOR DRIVING 99 MILES PER HOUR. 

Later Gators.

FEEDING AL THE ALLIGATOR KRAFT MARSHMALLOWS

I was pastor of Waycross Church of the Nazarene before the Bears won the super bowl. My family and I fed Kraft marshmallows to Al the alligator at the edge of the Okefenokee swamp. When the 14 ft Al roared out of the swamp huge Jaws open wide my friends always ran back to the car to take pictures while my family stayed behind me as I gently tossed marshmallows into Al's mouth. One of the benefits of being fearless.

When Mary and I moved to Plymouth to take care of Mary's deteriorating Alzheimer's on Plum Street my neighbor across the road was from Waycross and had seen Al the alligator many times. Of course, because of a crazy family feeding it marshmallows, it's now fenced off. Of course.

MICHAEL KICKS SATAN'S ASS

This article is a work in progress and will be added to later. 

Wow. Thanks to the very astute Don the Blogger I now understand why Satan hates me personally so much. My namesake angel Michael kicks his ass out of heaven. I am honored to be named after him even though everyone that has stood by me or was named William Michael has died. I feel like Charlie Kirk. Just a catalyst.

GOD JUDGES THE DEMOCRATIC PARTY

I wrote this as a note to Surber Nation Mental Health Support Group ie Don Surber Substack

Good morning boys and girls. It's always a joy to check in with you and read Don's excellent historical studies of the great Donald J Trump. Now excuse me while I go clean my toilet with liberal tears. It's a similar experience to standing at the edge of hell and listening to weeping, wailing, and nashing of teeth. The mighty tree of the Democratic party has been cut down but the beautiful common sense independent sprout is growing in prosperous union strong Pennsylvania. Later Gators.

GOD ANSWERS SPECIFIC PRAYERS, SOMETIMES MIRACULOUSLY

My sister-in-law had a specific prayer answered for her kitty cat. Being a believer in specific prayers, I was not surprised. Here's why. 

Around 20 years ago I made the mistake of asking God for a president that had financial understanding and now look at the mess we're in or maybe it's good. That's my favorite President would see sorry say, we will say we will see not the secretary's fault it's my mushmouth. Later Gators

TEXTING WITH MY SIBLINGS INCLUDING MY PREACHER BROTHER

so, when I collapsed against the wall with my Hancock guide head cockeyed yelling at my secretary again I had my adorable neighbor call for help and I found out after 3 days in the hospital that it was my electrolytes so if you're making stock market investments may I suggest Gatorade and other brands like it. anybody else discover the same thing Theodore? Hmmm. also the main lesson I learned is never go to the hospital again because they're coffee their coffee yelling again is I'll use the Wesleyan word dog doo doo. I'm trying to work my way back to the Evangelical world now that I've forgiven them for canceling tariffs back during prohibition. you're welcome America.

I'm also upset at bible believing Christians for creating the Mormon church by chasing them out of Illinois and all the way to Utah and now they are our somewhat useful allies except for of course Pierre delecto or mitt Romney who is a snake in the grass.

THANK YOU MY DAUGHTER AND ADOPTED SON

I have stated before that I have briefly subscribed to the New York times when it was a paper and I have picked up many an issue when it was in the line at the grocery store and now I get the majority of my news for $5 a month from my mental health group and I am saving a ton of money, so thank you, fearless leader, we're being a major contributor to my mental health. I think I'll have my well-trained daughter to sharpens me with mostly friendly today and now I am adding my son? Who has also been trying by his mother trained dumbass secretary and now also the base with me debates with me I'm yelling now and now to vent my frustrations I am on tic tac to talk tick tock to listen to Scott Jennings finally debate without getting fired with a dummies on CNN.